Each episode, we choose a favorite obscure or semi-obscure horror movie, and run it down, scene by scene filling in plot hole, and connecting dropped story threads where they might occur...
Episodes
Thursday Jun 18, 2020
Thursday Jun 18, 2020
In the future, Venice will be a toxic hellscape of mutant monsters and zombie-like crazies with guns. But not to worry. Megaforce, the greatest fighting team ever assembled, is here to protect what I believe to be an abandoned power plant. Many mutants will be dispatched, many dummies will be thrown over railings, and many copyrights will be infringed.
In fact, for more information about the plot and dialog, just go to IMDB and look up the plot to Aliens. It's almost verbatim.
Remember when that middle school class put on production of Aliens, and Sigourney Weaver went and everybody was so enchanted? This is like that, but on a lower budget, and with much worse acting. Oh, and eventually there's a Terminator. So strap on a bunch of little plastic boxes, get on your best chest bursting outfit, and call your copyright lawyer, as Tristan and Matt toss themselves over the power plant railing that is, Shocking Dark.
Thursday Jun 04, 2020
Thursday Jun 04, 2020
If you ever saw the movie Alien and thought, "Why isn't this a low budget buddy cop movie?". Fred Olen Ray has you covered. In what looks to be a 15 minute short film stretched to feature length using scenes of lab guys saying things like, "Shut it down!," and "It appears to have gone dormant." We have our hero shooting kids for stealing halloween masks, stealing alien eggs from the scene of a multiple homicide, having an inappropriate office romance with a woman approximately six-hundred years his junior, and abusing the tough guy cliche of using scotch as a bullet remover. Grab your sexiest bagpiping outfit, and a jam-jar full of deadly poison as Matt and Tristan talk about the 1989 piece of alien fan-fic, Deep Space.
Thursday May 28, 2020
Thursday May 28, 2020
Although the titular trap is mostly forgotten until the end, it does indeed trap witches. Or ghosts. Or the ghosts of warlocks if you're being specific. But not well. And technically it vacuums them up. So, although this may have the same director, same villain, and same premise as the Witchboard movies, I think of it as really more of a prequel to the Luigi's Mansion games.
So grab your beeping ghost-vacuum, the heart of an evil warlock, and drink down your favorite jar of cremains with neanderfucks Matt and Tristan as they spring 1989's classic film Witchtrap.
Wednesday May 20, 2020
Wednesday May 20, 2020
When failing stock broker Brian hits rock bottom after literally failing at every aspect of his life except being hot and having a hot wife he decides to take stock tips from his creepy occultist landlord's ouija board. After his stock purchases lead him to murder a loan shark and his goon, he tries to destroy the board, it electrocutes him, and hijacks his body. Now it's a wacky race against time to get his body back. Join Matt, Tristan, and Nargor and his Cult of Fertility as they dissect the Satanic stock trading romp, Witchboard 3 : The Posession.
Wednesday May 06, 2020
Wednesday May 06, 2020
After a Ouija board (or for copyright reasons, "Witchboard") falls out of the closet of her new loft apartment, accountant and aspiring artist Paige becomes obsessed with solving the murder of a woman who's spirit is stuck in her building because she might have been murdered there.
That's cool and all, but I guess all you really need to know about this movie is that there's a scene in which a wrecking ball kills a hippie and demolishes her microbus.
Join Matt and Tristan as they get progressively entrapped by the off-brand Ouija board that is Witchboard 2 : The Devil's Doorway.
Wednesday Apr 29, 2020
Wednesday Apr 29, 2020
When stereotypical frat douche Brandon whips out his ouija board at a fancy dress party, no surprise, it brings the festivities to a screeching halt faster than if he'd started playing that one Everlast song on an acoustic guitar. In addition to killing the party's vibe, he also summons a dead axe murdering psycho who used to live in the house, all while emasculating Tawny Kitaen's new boyfriend by insulting him while giving Tawny weird limp handed back-rubs. It's a showdown for the fate of her soul pitting the goodness of a dude who only proves himself to not be a sociopath around minute 65, and the evil of a boardgame available at Walmart. Buckle into your Shelby Cobra, set your shower to extra hot, and join Tristan and Matt to enjoy the type of horror that only Parker Brothers can provide, in 1986's classic film Witchboard. TTFN!
Tuesday Apr 21, 2020
Tuesday Apr 21, 2020
When the residents of a small Oregon town Freddy Krueger the local doctor for harvesting hearts to repair his dead wife, lil baby Dr Giggles escapes the murder mob by hiding inside the corpse of his dead mother. He gets caught at age 7 and put into a mental institution where he gets his doctorate in giggology. Eventually he escapes and returns to his home town to punish random people who had nothing to do with his father's death. Join Matt and Tristan as they talk in fun robot voices over Zoom. This one sounds like shit, but it's fun and you haven't talked to another human for weeks. You probably don't remember what people sound like.
Monday Mar 23, 2020
Monday Mar 23, 2020
Traumatized by seeing his mother having sex with a low rent Andrew Dice Clay, Arthur goes bonkers and kills them both. Thanks to a combination high protein asylum food, and regular exercise, Arthur grows up to be a huge pro-wrestler sized spree killer. He kills a ton of people, but gets obsessed with the one that got away. She happens to be an actress shooting a sci-fi movie in the desert, which allows them to showcase some terrible costumes, and some amazing Gahan Wilson monsters. As we're in the midst of a global apocalypse, Matt was unavailable, so Tristan is joined by his wife Michelle for this very special episode of The Fun Box Monster Podcast.
Wednesday Mar 11, 2020
Wednesday Mar 11, 2020
Sorority Babes is an example of a movie. Join Matt, Tristan, and special guest Brandon Kawashima for a podcast which discusses it.
Wednesday Mar 04, 2020
Wednesday Mar 04, 2020
Have you ever seen Omega Man and wished it was full of Valley Girls? I may have a film for you.
On the night of the return of the comet that killed the dinosaurs, our hero Reggie is too busy playing Tempest and getting busy to go out and watch. This, combined with the steel shielding in the building saved her from a fate of becoming either a pile of dust, or one of what seems like maybe 3 zombies in all of LA. As zombie movies go, not really such a bad deal for our heroes. But like every other movie ever made, the true monster...is man. So barricade yourself in your steel-lined bunker, steal some Twizzlers, grab your Mac 10 from that weapons depot that all the teens know bout and join Tristan and Matt for Night Of The Comet.