Fun Box Monster Podcast

If you're like me, and I mostly am, the eighties mean one thing to you. Ninjas. Those silky suited little dickenses were everywhere. True story, I once left a dorm on my college campus and there was a ninja just hanging out in a tree. 8am on a weekday. Just sitting there. Why? Fucked if I know. There was no reason. Like this movie. Why would you make a ninja movie about a possessed phone company line person who moonlights as an aerobics instructor? You wouldn't. It shouldn't be done. But dammit, I'm mighty glad it was. Join Matt and Tristan as they follow the floating sword through one of the weirdest movies of the eighties, Ninja 3 : The Domination. 

Nothing ruins a slumber party like a rockabilly (ghost?) with a drill guitar, murdering your friends while singing and dancing like he's in an unlicensed knock-off production of Grease. But, it does make for compelling cinema. Join Tristan and Matt as they buzz their way through the singingest, dancingest, slasher film of the eighties, Slumber Party Massacre 2. 

When the guy that played, "Q" from Star Trek the Next Generation had his military grade killbot program shut down, he took the only reasonable action: Repurposing said killbot as a children's toy. Somehow this bold marketing strategy backfires and a bunch of people get killed. This is the world of Evolver. Features Arcade Punks, janky robots, really well known character actors, hacking scenes complete with nonsensical buzzwords, and a mom character that is so unlikable it's shocking she survives the movie. Join Matt and Tristan as they attempt to beat level 4 of EVOLVER.

Journey with us...INTO THE FUTURE.... The year is 2006. Survival horror games are playing on every PS2 in the world. A group of teens with a seemingly endless supply of OFFICIAL ALIENWEAR PC components, does battle with Elisabeth Bathory, who has moved to Ohio and started developing polygonal video game tech. Luckily for us, the game starts killing people in real life, or it would just be people playing video games. Who would watch that? Anyway, Ohio citizen Bathory is killing anybody that dies in the game. Our plucky teens need to overcome the police, their inner turmoil about housing, and a fear of fire to save the day and put some nails into this lady's face. PLUS IT HAS FRANKIE MUNIZ and a guy who ISN'T MATTHEW LILLARD. BUY ALIENWEAR!

Once upon a time, some old guy in an attic with deep vein thrombosis of the forehead, lured some middle-aged teens into an old house. This house was haunted by...well, pretty much everything. There's zombies. There's a vest wearing were-cat. Some copyright infringing Ghoulies. A hallway monster with a tentacle that melts your face. There's a Spider-Lady, a glowing ball-head lady, some fart monsters, and too many others to count. Despite this movie being cut down to 45 minutes and then rebuilt by a new director who had never seen a horror movie, this movie has a certain something that we can't help but love. Listen as Matt and Tristan put their most positive spin on the USA Up All Night classic movie, Spookies. 

Like Dracula's castle or Frankenstein's lab, the Golden Gate Bridge is known for one thing: Neon Maniacs. That baby is just full of these little guys. There's an entire Village People's worth of monsters with specific jobs, with enough left over for an Abba and like 2 Bee Gees. You've got Samurai who cuts stuff, a biker who hits stuff with a chain, a noose Guy, who does noose stuff, the little sentient avocado with meathooks for hands who is surprisingly an accomplished classical pianist. Plus a bevy of other fun friends. Join Tristan and Matt as they dissect a true eighties classic, in spite of it giving us neither an ending, nor any idea of who our villains are or what they want. 

Zoinks gang! There's a legend of a Monster Dog haunting the old house on the hill. We should go investigate! ALICE COOPER! What are you doing here? Well, if you must know, my dad was pitchforked to death for werewolfism, and so now I'm here to record a music video for this song that I recorded on a Fostex Four-track. Jeepers...This mystery just keeps getting stranger! Join Matt and Tristan as they investigate the mystery that is Monster Dog. 

See George Kennedy, armed only with an axe and a yellow sunhat, take on the terror of Space Bigfoot!!! You'll witness aliens, nude sacrifices, and wacky gorilla mask pranks. Thrill as a weird goblin that lives in a high-tech trashcan turns people into zombies with his butt. Scream with terror as Bigfoot steals a toaster oven! Matt and Tristan dive face first into the DEMONWARP!!! Stay tuned through to the end to hear Smeardog and the Doughnut's loving musical tribute to the film!

Welcome to Doctor Reanimator's Secret Brain Lab where our helpful staff will help you to confuse apples and baseballs. Enjoy our meticulously maintained boiler room complete with as much complimentary sodium as you and your family may need! While you're here at the Brain lab, you can enjoy a live taping of our television show, visit our mental institution, or just run up and down our many plentiful staircases. Of course, no trip would be complete without meeting our eponymous brain. But don't get too close! He bites! (That's also a metaphor!) Join Matt and Tristan as they unpack Canada's greatest internal organ based horror movie, The Brain. 

If you aren't in this for the Child's Play ripoff elements, or the Exorcist ripoff elements, you should stay for Rip Torn's intermittant Spanish accent and smokey eye makeup. Throw in Denise Crosby doing her very best in spite of the material and a kid who it turns out really didn't need to be there, and you have a movie that I can't for the life of me understand why I like so much. Join Matt and Tristan as they cuddle up with Dolly Dearest.